


(Screw) Not Falling in Love With You

by TheLittleGirlFromSokovia



Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: Angsty Jade West, Bisexual Cat Valentine, Bisexual Jade West, Eventual Happy Ending, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Jade West Has Feelings Too, Minor Beck Oliver/Jade West, Mutual Pining, One Shot Collection, Post-Break Up, Soft Jade West, but she's so soft for Cat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-02-28
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:55:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22825219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLittleGirlFromSokovia/pseuds/TheLittleGirlFromSokovia
Summary: <)) put up withphraseto tolerate; endure.<)) love/ləv/nounan intense feeling of deep affection.
Relationships: Cat Valentine/Jade West
Comments: 10
Kudos: 88





	1. Sparks Fly

_“And you stood there in front of me just_

_Close enough to touch_

_Close enough to hope you couldn't see_

_What I was thinking of...”_

_“Sparks Fly,” Taylor Swift_

Jade West had always been a fighter.

Fight or flight? Lover or fighter?

She wasn’t one to fly when things got hard, and she definitely wasn’t a lover. 

But lately she had been questioning that. Questioning herself. Lately being…the last few years.

* * * * * 

Jade had always had a prickly personality. She always had the notion that if someone could deal with her without her having to put up a façade, then they were a friend to keep. That was why she didn’t have many friends, she supposed.

It was hard to find someone that wouldn’t only _put up with you,_ but _love you_ for who you were. She downright disliked Tori, and though that was beginning to become false, she didn’t think she was anywhere close to even being a friend of hers. Andre and Robbie put up with her - despite her insults and (sometimes) hurtful actions. They didn’t ignore her – but they didn’t seek her out either. They _put up with_ her. And Jade just wished she could find someone that would take those words and replace them with _loved._ These ‘friends’ of hers – they let her stay around, but they were still _scared_ of her. They didn’t _want_ to hang out with her. But Jade had nowhere else to go to, so she stayed.

She stayed. She stayed because Beck was no longer an option.

This was the atmosphere Jade lived in after Beck dumped her. She dated him for…a while. It was her way of keeping her place in his friend group, and of having someone who cared (even a little) about her. She had a handsome boyfriend, and kept her reputation as the badass of Hollywood Arts. But, of course, Becky couldn’t keep _putting up_ with her for so long. He dumped her because he wasn’t happy. And…if she was being honest, Jade wasn’t happy either. Not with Beck, anyway. She was happy with the _idea_ of Beck. The sweet boyfriend who would do anything for you if you asked. But if Jade couldn’t be Jade around him, then who was he? If Beck couldn’t _deal_ with her, who was he? _Nobody,_ Jade thought to herself, as she sat alone in Sikowitz’s classroom. She was surrounded by people, of course, but she was alone.

Alone only because Cat was late to class.

Jade would never admit it, but Cat might be her favorite person in the world. Jade’s father hated her, her mother barely spoke to her, and her little brother was pretty much terrified of her. So, after Jade and Beck broke up, Jade spent most of her time with Cat. (She always had, but it had practically quadrupled since the breakup.) They had always had a weird sort of co-dependency with each other, but it had grown to a new level when Beck left. They were such complete opposites – it was insane. But for some reason, they just clicked. Cat would do something stupid, Jade would teach her how to do it right. Jade would yell at someone, Cat would calm her down. Cat would get distracted talking about her psychotic brother, Jade puts her back on course. Jade starts feeling lonely again, Cat makes her laugh. They completed each other, in a way. And even though Jade was openly mean to Cat in public, anyone close to her could tell that what she had with Cat was special.

Jade zoned back in to Cat bursting through the door to Sikowitz’s classroom, with feathers in her hair.  
  


“Hi!” Cat said this in her soft voice, but in a _very_ loud tone.

Sikowitz responded,

“Yes…Cat. Dare I ask - why were you late to class today?”  
  
There was a collective sigh in the room.

“Well see, my brother was driving me to school, but he wanted to stop to see the ducks. He wanted to feed them, but I only had gumdrops, so he threw the gumdrops at the ducks and they came after us and – ”

“Aggghhhhhhh,”

Jade cut Cat off with a loud whine, causing Cat to smile, come sit down next to her, and start combing her fingers through her own hair. Feathers fell from her fingertips as her hands combed through her strawberry red hair. Jade stared at them as they fell to the floor of the carpeted classroom. 

Sikowitz resumed his teaching.

Jade looked at Cat. “You know your brother is a literal psycho.”

Cat responded without looking at Jade, saying, “My brother is _pretty_ messed up.”

Jade tapped her shoulder, causing Cat to look at her. Jade said, “So…you okay?”  
  
Cat smiled. “Yeah – it turns out that ducks don’t have very sharp teeth.”  
  
“Ducks don’t have – never mind.”

They watched as Sikowitz taught something called Backwards Acting, another one of his weird ideas, and Jade watched Cat as she pulled more and more feathers (and gumdrops, apparently) out of her hair, giggling as she did.  
  
* * * * *

Jade sat down during a free period she had, sketching in her notebook instead of studying for her cultural arts class. She was drawing a person, a girl, someone she didn’t know yet. That was how most of her drawings started: she just let her hand do whatever it pleased, leaving her to identify it later. It looked like a small girl, hand in the air.

That was when Jade looked to her left to see Cat at the vending machine. She bought a grape soda. Jade watched it fall to the slot at the bottom of the machine. Then she watched Cat pick it up, look at it, then walk slightly to her right…then throw it into the garbage. Cat stood there looking into the distance dreamily, until the bell rang a few moments later.

Jade squinted at Cat in confusion as she watched her start to walk away. She coolly got up from her position, walking in front of Cat. Cat just stared at her. Then Jade said,

“Cat, why’d you just throw your drink in the trash?”

“Oh, cause I wasn’t thirsty.”

Jade pointed at the vending machine with her pencil, confusion still written all over her face.

“But, but y-you bought – oh, forget it.”

Jade had learned not to question Cat’s actions – for, normally, there was no sane reason for any of them. That was one of the reasons that Jade loved Cat. She did love her, even if she would _never_ admit it willingly. Love. Dating. Dates. Weekends. This weekend.

_Shit,_ Jade thought. She had nothing to do this weekend, or any weekend, now that she had broken up with Beck. Or, Beck broke up with her. Screw it, it didn’t matter. What mattered was that she, Jade West, would be spending a weekend alone. She would rather spend a night with _Vega_ than spend it alone, and that was saying something. And even though Cat could be taxing on Jade’s limited patience, she wasn’t _awful_ to hang out with. Or even bad at all. But Jade, again, would never, _ever,_ say that to _anyone._

Jade thought, _Be cool. Just ask her in a sly, but normal way. Be cool._

She had never thought so carefully about asking something that would have been normal had Beck been with her.

*Sigh*… _Beck._

“What are you doing Saturday night?”

Cat looked up at Jade, excitedly telling her,

“I’m dog-sitting for my mom’s boss!”

Everything Cat said ended in an exclamation point. So, not the perfect weekend activity, but with Cat it would do. So, Jade responded,

“Oh. What kind of dog?”

“Well,” Cat started, staring at her lip gloss bottle, “I’m not sure…he’s got paws and a tail.”  
  
Cat smiled, bringing the lip gloss across her lower lip.

Jade thought about how unconsciously cute Cat was. She literally looked like a strawberry shortcake doll, but walking and talking. Loudly. _Weird concept,_ Jade thought.

Cat smacked her lips together, startling Jade out of her thoughts, and finishing her discovery about the dog she would be caring for.

“Maybe he’s an English paw-tail!”

Jade rolled her eyes at Cat, and even though she made fun of Cat for her borderline stupidity… she kinda loved her for her childlike view on the world.

This brought Cat back to what Jade had first said, so Cat asked her,

“Why? What are you doing Saturday night?”

For some reason, Jade almost told her. _I’m alone. I have nobody to care for me anymore, and I fear the fact that I have become too dependent on a small, airhead redhead._ She wanted to point at the soda Cat had thrown in the garbage and say, this is what I feel like. But she didn’t say that. They were at school. She had a reputation to uphold. Jade West’s emotional walls emerged, the moat surrounding them being filled with fear, doubt, and…ugh… _feelings._

“Oh, what, you think because Beck and I broke up I don’t have anything to do Saturday night?”  
  


Too hard for Cat. Jade cursed at herself internally.

Cat responded, hurt, saying, “No, I never said tha –”

Jade interrupted her, saying,

“I’ve got a lot of things that I’m gonna do! Like – tons.”

She tried to lower her tone. She yelled at most everyone, but she _never_ yelled at Cat. Tried to. Sometimes it would come out – and Jade hated herself every time it happened.

Cat just said, “Ok…”  
  


Jade knew there was no need for her façade with Cat. Cat knew who she was, on the inside. It made Jade want to vomit thinking about her heart and its feelings, but with Cat, she just couldn’t avoid it. Jade would be happy to dog sit any dog with her, as long as they were together. Cat was the only one who stayed with her after Beck left. She _softened Jade West._ Cat made Jade’s whole identity crumble down to the ground – okay, maybe that was a bit dramatic, but for Jade, it was real. She couldn’t even throw sarcasm at Cat without feeling like she just slapped herself. So…she decided to convince Cat that _she_ had invited Jade to come dog-sit with her. Made her do it. Jade thought of all this in about half a second, responding to Cat,

“I mean, if you want me to cancel my plans to come hang out with you while you dog-sit, then fine. Fine, I’ll do it.”  
  
Cat looked at Jade, puzzled, saying,

“You don’t have to –”

“I said I’ll do it!”

Jade snapped at Cat, wanting Cat to just accept the fact that she was going with her. And Cat seemed to understand. Very little, but she understood. Being alone had been torturous for Jade, and Cat wanted to do everything she could to help her best friend. But she was still confused as to why Jade was acting so…erratically. Yelling at Cat that she wants to hang out with her was quite the juxtaposition. Not that Cat knew what that word even meant.

“But you owe me, baby girl.”

Jade walked away, confident that she had gotten something to do on Saturday night - and best of all: it was with her best friend, Cat Valentine.

Cat watched Jade walk away, and completely perplexed as to what just happened, she said,

“Thank you!”  
  
I mean, she did get to hang out with Jade, her best friend that she loved. She stared at her black wavy hair as it bounced behind her. If hanging out with Jade wasn’t good, than what was?! Despite her confusion as to _how_ she got Jade to hang out with her, Cat was content. Both with her scheduled hang out – and her new nickname from Jade.

* * * * *  
  
In her car at the end of the day, Jade pulled out her sketch from earlier.

A girl waving her hand in the air, wearing a dress, a bow in the hair as bright as her personality. 

A girl, calling for Jade.

Cat. 


	2. Sparks Fly (Part Two)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jade and Cat both realize they might be in love. Whether they will ever admit it or not is totally up in the air, but unusual circumstances and certain confessions might be the breaking point. Or, perhaps, starting point of something amazing. The sparks that fly before a fire burns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is a part two for the last chapter, Sparks Fly. All of these will be Cade one-shots, being rewrites of different episodes of Victorious. I am not sure which one I will do next, but I will do Star Spangled Tori! Eventually! Promise! So I hope you like this one though. It's pretty similar to what happened in the episode, except Jade never breaks anything and Beck and Robbie never come to the house. So bon appetite

**“** _Cause I see,_

_Sparks fly,_

_Whenever you smile.”_

Cat rode her bike to her mom’s boss’s office and got the key from him. She stood in one of her favorite sweaters – a blue one with pink stitches on the sleeves. Cat did love pink, but the blue one was a special favorite of hers. She totally did not pick it because she knew that it was Jade’s favorite sweater of hers.

She hopped through the threshold of the millionaire’s home and was astounded to see high ceilings and marble floors. Cat’s house was a house, but it was not all that nice. Definitely not as nice as this house. Between her parents’ struggling marriage and her brother’s constant exploits, her home was not all that. Her own room stayed mostly clean because Jade wanted it so.

Jade did not seem like it, but she was extremely organized with her own things, and Cat’s too. She loved to have everything in the right place and definitely did not like people touching her things. Her house was pristine, although that might have been due to the fact that it was a huge house with only two residents – Jade and her father. Jade saw her mother often, but she lived with her father because he lived closer to Hollywood Arts. Jade’s little brother, Jasper, lived with her mother because it was closer to his middle school. It was tough on Jade, to say the least, but she never let it show.

Jade’s flaws and feelings were never seen out in the open like Cat’s were. You could only see those if you looked a little closer. Stared a little longer. Held the gaze of her emerald eyes for just a few extra seconds, and if she let you, you would get a glimpse through the cracks of her façade. You could see her crying in her room when her mother moved out with Jasper. You could see her punching her fist through a wall when Tori stole every role she had worked years for in a matter of days. You would see her laying on the floor of her room and staring at the ceiling, wondering when things would get better. When she could sew her scars back together with the stitches of actual happiness.

Cat saw these things. And all she had ever wanted to do was kiss Jade’s scars until Jade couldn’t feel them anymore.

Cat picked up the little dog waiting for her in the living room of the mansion and put him in her lap. His name was Coober, and he just wanted to lick Cat’s face all the time, making Cat giggle uncontrollably.

She couldn’t contain her excitement about Jade coming for long enough before she said to Coober,

“You know, Jade’s coming.”

Coober whimpered.

“Don’t worry! If she yells at you, just lick her face and she will laugh. I think. I hope.”

Then, Cat heard,

“CAT! Yo, Cat?!”

Cat startled.

“Coober! Jade’s here!”

Cat straightened her hair and waited for Jade to come in.

* * * * *

After Jade marveled at the apartment and admired the guitar, _(“Jade played the guitar, just another reason to love her, or at least think she was cute,”_ Cat thought.) Jade sat next to Cat and they watched a movie together. They ended up watching _“Teen Beach Movie,”_ because even though Jade swore she hated it, Cat knew she secretly was in love with Lela. _“Hopefully not just Lela,”_ Cat thought.

Although Cat did not know for sure what Jade’s sexuality was, she was as sure about the fact that her brother was crazy as she was about the fact that Jade definitely like girls. She made comments about girls on TV she had crushes on (example: Lela). And she definitely had a…vibe? Cat would be the last person to assume anything about anyone…but there was no way Jade was not at least bisexual. Like Cat was. And then the thought returned. The one that always crashed into her when she thought about Jade and her sexuality. Did Cat think Jade was bi because she was, or because Cat really, really wanted her to be?

* * * * *

They were laying on the couch, Cat laying on Jade’s legs, while Jade mindlessly played with Cat’s hair as she slept. Jade thought about nothing and everything as her hands brushed through the strawberry locks of her best friend’s hair. She loved Cat, that was out of the question, but how did she love Cat? As a friend?

The re-examination of all her drawings of girls in her room would suggest otherwise.

After Jade concluded that her drawing was of Cat a day prior, she went to her room at home and looked at all her sketches. A girl smiling with hair behind her ears? Cat. A girl waving to the viewer, one hand behind her back as she smiled the sweetest smile one had ever seen? Cat. A girl with her tongue out and feathers in her hair? Cat. A girl curled up around the body of another girl as one stroked the other's hair? Cat. Cat and Jade. 

And if that didn’t make Jade rethink everything, what would?

Even as Jade stared at the magnificent creature that was Lela from Teen Beach Movie, she looked away, because how could she think about another girl when Cat was laying in her lap?

How hard it was to be so close, yet so far. So far from something you want more than anything.

And Jade did what she always did. What she did when things just got too hard. She began to sing.

_“The way you move is like a full-on rainstorm,_

_And I’m a house of cards,”_

Jade thought about Cat waltzing into their classroom with feathers in her hair, and began to sing, changing the song here and there to make it fit. Make it fit into her predicament. Her predicament with Cat.

_“You’re the kind of crazy that should send me running but I,_

_I really know that I won’t get far,”_

Jade took a breath as she watched Cat’s even breathing as she slept. Jade’s hand swept through her strawberry locks as her song continued.

_“And you lay here in front of me just,_

_Close enough to touch,_

_You’re close enough that I hope you just can’t see what I’ve been thinking of,”_

Jade’s voice wavered. Wavered because the ground shook. Ground. Ground shaking. Earthquake.

Jade tried to shake Cat awake, but she seemed deep asleep. Jade picked her up slowly, as slow as she could under the circumstances, and hurried to the closet. As she sat Cat in there, the ceiling started to collapse above them. Jade shoved Cat into the closet, who was just beginning to stir, and tried to get in. Then Jade realized. _Shit._

The fucking dog.

Jade dashed back to the couch to pick up a trembling Coober. You would think she felt heroic, but she just felt stupid jumping over broken glass with a small Shih Tzu in her hands. She felt something hit her shoulder on the way back into the closet but figured it was nothing. Or, not as important as Cat Valentine’s happiness when she would find that Jade had “saved” both her and Coober. She then sat in the closet with Cat in her lap, Coober on a pillow in the corner. The closet was filled with blankets, and she covered Cat in them for fear of the ceiling falling more. Pieces of it did fall when Jade carried Coober to the closet, and it seemed that one had scraped Jade’s shoulder. It bled, but it seemed okay to Jade. Then again, she was an Arts student, not a Med student.

It was _fine._

Jade felt the fabric of her shirt being pulled at, before Cat sat up suddenly, still in Jade’s lap, blankets covering her.

“…Jade?”

Jade sighed. Even though they were in full crisis mode, Jade loved Cat’s sleepy voice.

“Everything’s okay baby girl. There was an earthquake, and some things broke in the house, but you’re okay, and that’s what’s important.”

“But-but Coober…!”

“Coober is just fine, Cat.”

“But what about you Jadey!”

“What about me?”

“Your shoulder!”

Jade looked to her left to see blood all over her shoulder. It was just one small gash, and it really didn’t hurt. It looked worse than it felt really. But Cat went into hysterics.

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not!”

“I am, Cat.”

“Jade!”

“Cat what do you - ”

“Jade I can’t lose you!”

“Cat I’m right here - ”

“Jade I love you!”

“Cat, I…what?”

As the realization hit, Jade went quiet, the excuses and affirmations dying at her lips.

“You know I always have.”

Jade still couldn’t speak. She hated her brain sometimes. It was like it pushed away anyone too close to the infiltration zone. That zone where Jade would start caring about them more than herself. Nobody had really ever passed that zone with her before. But, she should have known. Cat Valentine passed that zone as soon as chocolate brown eyes met emerald green.

“…and you don’t love me back.”

Cat started to cry, and disregarding the fact that an earthquake had just happened, she tried to get out of the closet (ha ha).

“Cat!”

“Please…just don’t Jadey.”

Cat started to open the door, and Jade almost let her.

But she couldn’t let someone else leave.

**And she definitely couldn’t live without Cat Valentine.**

“Cat!”

Jade had said it loud enough that Cat looked back at her as she went to open the door. In a rush of adrenaline, Jade grabbed Cat and pulled her away from the door, from a crouch to a sitting position in her lap. She set her hands on either side of Cat’s face, and she pulled her face close so that their foreheads were touching. Jade wiped the tears from her face.

“…Jadey?”

“Just don’t talk, Valentine.”

Jade tilted Cat’s face upward, and their lips met. Fire seemed to ignite from Jade’s lips to Cat’s, and suddenly Cat was the only thing that mattered in the world. It felt as if they were connected now, as Cat’s lips moved against Jade’s, as Jade cupped Cat’s face in her hands. Jade never thought she could have it all. Much less be able to hold the whole world in her hands. Sparks flew as they broke apart, and Cat threw her arms around Jade and buried her face in the crook of her neck. Jade buried her face in Cat’s hair, taking in everything around her, everything that just happened. She took a breath.

Everything would be fine. Everything was perfect.


End file.
